If you want to set meaningful goals that you will feel excited and motivated to pursue to the very end, then you’ll want to consider this commonly ignored dimension to goal setting. While it’s blindingly obvious and rather simple, this is something I’ve always ignored to my own peril. I learnt this concept from author Danielle LaPorte. Here’s the simple premise, when we set goals, we mostly fail to consider the feelings part. How do I want to feel when this goal is accomplished?

Funny enough, our need to set goals is initially driven by feelings. We feel something about the current situation, we want a different feeling and therefore we set goals to accomplish certain tasks so we can have the desired feeling. That said, somewhere in the process, sometimes the feelings part gets caught up in the mechanics of planning and breaking down goals into tasks. Or it could be that conventional wisdom on gaol setting does not consider feeling. Or maybe it’s because we have not identified how we feel now and clearly articulated how we want to feel when the goals are accomplished.

Feelings are a touchy subject, especially with men. There is normally this weird notion that somehow being in touch with your feelings makes you less rational and being vulnerable makes you weak. I personally believe that constricting your emotions is like tying a rope around your legs and trying to run. You’ll trip yourself more times than you want and at best your only chances of getting there are either removing the rope or crawling painfully to your destination.

Next time you want to set goals. Start by identifying how you feel. Don’t you judge yourself for feeling that way? It is what it is. Then decide how you want to feel. Then proceed with the usual goal setting stuff. There’s plenty of advice on convectional goal setting so I’ll not delve in that. 

I would love your feedback and thoughts. What do you think about this process?

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